NAPOWRMO Day 9

What You Can’t See

Good morning love the day begins,
l see you there and smile.
I’m so in love l cannot move,
Just sit and stare a while.

The sunlight turns your skin to gold,
And I let out a sigh.
Your beauty’s more than I can take,
A tear comes to my eye.

l’m blessed I know though you still doubt,
To have you in my life.
You are my everything to me,
My lover, friend and wife.

The gift I’d give if it were mine,
You’d see you through my eyes.
And then at last you would believe,
It’s you alone I prize.

Cheers, Winston.

NAPOWRIMO Day 3.

The Best Things In Life Are… You!

Dear Universe, I’d like to say,
A thank you from my heart.
For bringing me this person who,
I’ve loved right from the start.

My love provides a piece of me
l didn’t know was gone.
She gives so much, brings me such joy,
My strength to carry on.

I was the one who could not see,
The joy in every day.
But love has helped me see that joy,
That life can bring my way.

So thank you life for bringing me,
This Angel whom I love.
And thank you love for coming here,
From Heaven up above

Cheers, Winston.

Mortality Redux

For some time, I had been getting chest pains. Like any sensible person, I saw my doctor. He referred  me to a specialist who did a treadmill stress test. The results at that time shoved no immediate threat.   Over the next year and a bit, things went from bad to downright nasty.

By the time I saw my doctor again, the pain was so severe I couldn’t walk for five minutes without stopping to rest. Two or three times.

So my doctor referred me back to the same cardiologist who administered the same stress test. This time the results were a bit more spectacular. He immediately referred me to the University of Ottawa Heart Institute at the Civic Hospital here in Ottawa.  Priority is determined by severity. I’d heard stories of people who had waited six to eight months to get an appointment.  I had my first appointment a month later. This to me was a very bad sign.

The appointment was for an angiograph. For this procedure, they thread  a needle through a major artery in either the groin or wrist. (Please oh please let it be the wrist).   They run it up to the heart, pump in some dye and look at how the blood is moving through the heart. Or mostly not in my case.

They managed to tap the radial artery in my wrist (I LOVE working with professionals!).   Just so you know, they want you awake for the whole procedure. All the drugs you want, but still awake.   They get the dye in and start telling me just how bad it is. Some of the major arteries in the left side of my heart are  over ninety percent blocked. They need to put in stents to open them back up.   They do that. It hurts. I get more drugs.

In total, I’ve now got four stents in my heart.   I can walk to work without any pain in my chest. I can go up stairs without grabbing my chest like Redd Foxx in Sanford & Son. Long story short, I’ve got a new lease on life. Literally.

An interesting phrase that one. “A new lease on life”.   Like any lease, some terms and conditions apply. One of those conditions involves making some fairly significant changes in my life. Eat healthier. In my case, the main change involves gelting my diabetes under control. HUGE risk factor for heart attack there. Ten years ago I quit smoking (Soooo glad I don’t have to deal with quitting that too). Giving up sugar makes tobacco look like a walk in the park. So that’s a work in progress. Lot’s of work, not so much with the progress. But I’m  sticking with it. A lot of highly skilled people spent years of their lives learning how to prevent me from dying.   I’d feel a bit of a berk if I wasted all that (not to mention feeling a bit dead as well).

I’ve also got to walk more, eat less and learn to let go of my stress. Some goals are easier than others. I probably shouldn’t stress about it though. That’s one of the terms of the lease. Let’s face it, leasing isn’t the same as owning. If you lease a car, they’re not going to be happy if you paint it chartreuse before you hand it back at the end of the lease.   The same thing applies to my heart now. A lot of people now have a vested interest in my health, and that gives them a big say in the terms of that new lease. That’s probably a good thing given how I handled things as the sole owner. Maybe I’ve learned to treat myself a little better. Hopefully, I’ve learned something from all this. But what is the big picture lesson here?

Well, I’ve learned that my doctor is probably with the mafia. Every time I see him, he tells me that if I don’t do what he says I’m going to die.  But that’s really not too “big picture”. The big picture is actually a bit more cliched. You never really know just how long you’ve got. After it was all done, I was talking to one of my doctors and he told me I was one bad decision away from a major heart attack. A few months later, I turned fifty. I might not’ve made it that far. I might not have been there for my daughters  eventual wedding, or my hypothetical grandchildren, or to grow old with my wife.

There’s a lot  things that I still want to do. If take proper care of this new lease, there’s no reason I can’t do all of them. So now I’m off to stick my belly full of insulin and get to bed… it’s one of the terms of the lease.

More Soon!

Cheers, Winston.

Personal Creativity Project: Poetry

My Dad and I didn’t always see eye to eye. But despite that, we never gave up on each other. Keeping those lines of communication open gave us the chance to grow and change and grow together.

This poem is for my Father,

Thank You

So Father’s Day Rolls ’round again,
I want to thank my Dad.
I learned so much from him it’s true,
So much more good than bad.

When I was young I could not see,
Sometimes he did know best.
But now I know ’cause I’ve had time,
The things he taught to test.

He wasn’t right all of the time,
But no one is it’s true.
He did his best to raise us right,
Good people in his view.

My Father passed some time ago,
I miss him to this day.
I am so glad that through the years,
I found the words to say.

So thank you Dad for all you gave,
And all you taught to me.
You taught me how to find myself,
And who I want to be.

Cheers, Winston

Personal Creativity Project: Poetry

Thinking of Ray Bradbury and Clive Barker tonight.  Love the sinister carnival theme. 

The Carnival

Behold the great and secret show,
Dare you to enter in?
There’s love and beauty honor too,
Debauchery and sin.

There’s every kind of freak inside,
Just take a look my friend,
You’ll see we’re really all the same,
Mere mortals in the end.

We travel round from place to place,
We’ve travelled everywhere.
Though all agree the show is great, None want us anywhere.

So see the show then tell your friends,
Tell everyone you know.
But do it soon for Monday night,
It’s on the road we go.

The great and secret show’s in town,
A brief engagement run.
So grab your love and came on down,
If our show sounds like fun.

Cheers, Winston

Personal Poetry Challenge Day Sixty-Six

As I said in yesterdays post, my daughter just finished college.  I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say until I started writing. 

Your Proud Dad

Three years of projects, papers, tests ,
Exam time twice a year.
All culminate in this one night,
When loved ones come to cheer.

You’ve worked so hard and stayed the course,
However hard it got.
And now you stand upon the stage,
In your deserved spot.

You’ve learned so much from books and life,
My child you’ve grown so.
And now your life unfolds ahead,
Just choose where you will go.

Your school done you look ahead,
Look now at where you are.
Look back at where you were before,
I’m proud you’ve come so far.

My graduate l’m proud of you,
And all you’ve accomplished.
You’ve learned so much and come so far,
You’re all I could have wished.

Love you Cynthia.  Win

Personal Poetry Challenge Day Sixty-Five

Sooo…. yesterday my daughter graduated from college (yes I am incredibly PROUD)The ceremony was in the evening, then we went for supper.  Long story short, by the time I got home I was just too tired to write anything.  But today I’m back on track.

It rained the other day and everyone who came into my store complained about the weather  Personaly I really like the rain.  The following poem explains why.

Happy Rainy Days

The sky turns grey the rain pours down,
The world a deeper green.
Some hate the grey and hate the rain,
A drought they’ve never seen.

They love the sun they worship it.
Act like it’s everything.
Without the water from the rain,
There’d be no green this spring.

From trees to lawns to shrubs and weeds,
All plants now celebrate.
For though they love the sun like us,
Rain makes then feel so great.

A bird bathes in a pool where,
Some critters paused to drink.
So when you grumble at the clouds,
Of all this you should think.

Cheers, Winston

Personal Poetry Challenge Day Sixty-One

A truly beautiful and summer-like day today.  Had me wishing Lynn and I were up at our trailer.  Still, if I can’t be there (pesky work), I can still dream.

Also, today marks two full months of daily poetry writing.  Not sure if I should try to keep it going or give it a rest.  I’d be interested to hear what you think.

Daydreaming Summer

Today’s the kind of day of which,
We dream all winter through.
The sun so warm, the cooling breeze,
Beneath a sky so blue.

On such a day as this my love,
I want to sneak away,
To be with you spend time with you,
And in the sunshine play.

We’d go out to our trailer, take,
A kayak on the lake.
When we got back we’d have a bite,
And then a campfire make.

Then after that we’d go to bed,
And maybe stay up late.
And that for me would have to be,
A nearly perfect date.

So now you know the dreams I dream,
When things at work are dead.
You’re always in my heart my love,
And often in my head.

Cheers, Winston

Personal Poetry Challenge Day Sixty,

Sick as a dog today.  I was feeling pretty miserable until I decided to change my brain.  Now my soul feels much better than my body.

Accepting Change

I know in fact that where I am,
Is where I’m meant to be.
But where I am is just for now,
I’m not the future me.

The only constant thing in life,
Is knowing it will charge.
No matter how we plot or plan,
Or try to rearrange.

We try to keep the things we love,
Be rid of all our woes.
But in our fickle universe,
That’s not oft’ how it goes.

Don’t take for granted those you love,
Assume they’re always there.
Ensure each day they know they’re loved,
Find ways to show you care.

I was alone so long before,
I met my love, my Lynn.
And so I know how rare this gift,
The awesome life I’m in.

So I give thanks for where I am,
Stay grounded in the now.
And marvel at the path I’ve climbed,
That led me here somehow.

Cheers, Winston

Personal Poetry Challenge Day Fifty- Nine

Family is probably the most important thing in my life.  Without their influence, it’s quite likely none of this would have been written.  So if you enjoy these verses, thank them.  If not, blame me.

Enjoy!

My Family Treasure

My family is my greatest joy,
Bring out the best in me.
My wife is still my closest friend,
And she will always be.

My daughter is an awesome kid,
I’m proud to be her Dad.
She’s smart and kind and love’s her dog,
Her smile makes me glad.

My wife puts up with all my moods,
She knows my quirks so well.
I am so blessed she is the one,
So everyone I tell.

My parents raised me up to be,
The man I am today,
And though they’re gone they still live on,
In what I do and say.

My siblings were my strength when I,
Had no strength of my own.
No matter what was happening,
I never was alone.

Even my dog the Chester dog,
Is such an awesome friend.
I love them all my family,
And on that note I’ll end.

Cheers, Winston