Conservative Canadian Senator Nicole Eaton has launched a campaign to replace the beaver as the symbol of Canada.  What you may wonder did she want to replace it with?  The “majestic and splendid polar bear”.  According to the allegedly honorable member, “The polar bear is the largest terrestrial carnivore… holding reign over the arctic for thousands of years.”

Ms. Eaton refers to the beaver as a “dentally defective rat” and a “toothy tyrant” who wreaks havoc on it’s environment.  It’s a “nineteenth century has been.” as opposed to the polar bear described as a “twenty-first century hero”.  But let’s take a closer look at the contenders.

Beavers are smart, monogamous, industrious herbivores found in every province.  Polar bears are strong, resourceful and good looking.  It’s a pretty simple question.  Do we want Canada represented by an idealized action figure, or something a bit more universal?  Beavers are hard working but unassuming.  You rarely see them, but you see their handiwork everywhere.  They undertake massive engineering projects.  Not for glory or posterity, but simply to provide for their families.  What is more utterly Canadian than that?

If Senator Eaton really wants to get rid of an outdated symbol of the nineteenth century, she could start with the senate.  When the rest of the world is clamoring to elect their governments, isn’t it time to get rid of these unelected tax drains.  If they really have nothing better to do than victimize and badmouth beavers, it’s time to rethink what the Senate says about Canada.  It seems to say we have a one hell of a lot of money to waste on people who don’t really seem to contribute all that much in return.

We’ve been talking about Senate reform for ages.  Maybe we just need to get our priorities straight.  Lets’s keep the beaver and ditch the senate.

Cheers, Winston